In a recent post in July, I described why I created My Minute Mentor and highlighted how self-doubt had affected my professional cricket career. In the post, I stated how researching into ‘how the mind works’ helped me to finally banish my feelings of self-doubt.
Banish self doubt?! How very naive of me…
Yesterday, I was afraid to pick up the phone. Yes, after all this reading and study, I was nervous about making a simple phone call. ‘Phone fear’ is how it is sometimes described by people in sales. Clearly, it wasn’t the harmless lump of plastic I was nervous about but the reaction of the person at the other end. I suddenly became very self-conscious. Why should the other person listen to me? Why should anyone value what I have to say? Do I know enough?
I admit that I felt ashamed to feel like this, especially after all of my studying and messages on this blog. “I’m supposed to be beyond this” I thought to myself.
Then, I realised how stupid I was being. Of course I am going to have times when I feel fear. I am a human being and being able to feel emotions, even ones that are considered to be negative, is what it means to be human. It made me realise that the aim isn’t to banish feelings but to understand them and to use them positively.
As my mentor told me today, the only way to ever learn is to experience ‘setbacks’ and if you are continually learning then ‘setbacks’ will be unavoidable!
The phone experience was a wake-up call. It reminded me that it is okay to feel nervous, to even feel afraid sometimes. I can now smile at the phone and say “Good effort but you haven’t beaten me yet!”