The Map is not the territory…
I am sure that we have all experienced situations where someone (often someone we are very close to) has seen a situation in a completely different way to the view that we hold. In some instances, they have feelings or opinions that are totally on the other end of the scale to our own.
How could this be?
Surely the experience was the same for both parties?
If this isn’t the case, what’s going on?
Although the event (the territory) may appear to be the same to us and to them, what they have experienced has been internalized in their own unique way. The chemical reactions that have occurred in their body have resulted in a behaviour that could be subtly or even vastly different from our own.
Their map of the territory is different to our own.
Being away of this can help to improve all relationships and can help to prevent unnecessary arguments with those we love – and even with those we don’t!
So, when the blood starts to boil and the frustration starts to build just say to yourself ‘the map is not the territory’ and see how this transforms the situation.
I can assure you that I will be following the same advice…